The dreaded question. How do you answer it?
I met up with a group of ladies this past week that I haven't seen in years. Most of them I don't think I've seen since I got married over 4 years ago. The morning of, while I was getting ready, I was thinking about the question. It was likely that I would be asked, and I wanted to be ready to answer it.
Caution needs to be used in your answer. You don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable. Afterall, it's not their fault I haven't been able to have a baby. They don't know I am having struggles. And maybe if I answer in a particular way, it will help them to be more sensitive in the future if another woman is in the same boat as me and has no kids.
I struggled to find the perfect answer. Do you just be upfront and say it how it is? "Well we've been trying to 22 months and it seems I can't fall pregnant." Or do you sugar coat it? "We've been trying for a little while now but I'm sure it will happen!" Or just kinda lie? "Shouldn't be much longer now!!!"
I couldn't decide how to respond and I still don't know. Luckily I wasn't asked.
I used to be able to just say it as it was and be upfront, but I find it more difficult to be that way because it makes me sad to hear myself say it out loud. Plus, I don't like to make people feel like a bad person for asking it when they happen to be pregnant for the fourth time in 5 years because they are extremely fertile......
5 comments:
Christy, while reading this my heart breaks for you. I can't ever imagine what this journey is like for you other than what I have experienced with family and friends who have walked down the same road. BUT, I want you to know that my thoughts and prayers are with you and I will always be here for you whether you need a shoulder to cry on, a chat, a laugh or you need a plain old fashioned rant - I will be here for you whatever happens. Hugs, Dongella Xx
I hated that question because the answer was so hard. So I would smile and say "eventually" as if getting pregnant would either be a happy accident or deliberately not for a while yet.
Thanks Dons & Maioha. Maioha, I like that answer. It's the happy medium really... I might try and use it next time.
You know I hear ya! It's a tough thing to deal with especially being a member and basically knowing that having children is one of your main purposes as a woman. It sucks! Hang in there and get some answers.
Ugh. Hated that question too.
My response usually depended on my mood, probably not a good thing. Being on hormone treatment made me unpredictable.
Post a Comment